Through The Looking Glass

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Anthony Bourdain killed himself on June 8, 2018. He struggled with addiction and depression. He was a man who tried to find some missing part of himself. He fought every day. Got up early. Did his job. Tried to manage his emptiness with drugs, work, alcohol, and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. He wrote. He traveled. He lived.

I hear you. The ones who judge from ivory towers. The privileged few who’ve never met depression or inner struggle. The perfect, flawless few. May you never have to walk in too dark a shadow.

How many times had he stood at the cliff’s edge and found a reason to step back onto the cliff? Sure, he was too weak for one moment in a long 61 years. That’s all it took. One moment. A few seconds. Tragic.

Try to imagine yourself standing with one foot hanging over the abyss. What final thought would be the quick wind that pushes you over the edge? What would you need to prevent your falling?

The news of Bourdain’s death crushed me. I was a fan. He was more wizard than hero to me. I read the books and watched his shows. Bourdain convinced me to try a Negroni (which I strongly recommend if you like a good, stiff drink). He is the inspiration for my Life Adventure List (formerly Bucket List). He taught me to start small and that the difference between watching and living is as simple as standing up and heading to the local pub.

As someone directly impacted by the loss of loved ones whose lives ended in a moment of weakness and isolation, I ask that you please be vigilant of those closest to you. The past few years have been tough, and the pressure has not lightened up. People have lost jobs, friends, and family members. So many of us are trying to navigate an angry world. Bad news is being pushed at us all the time. It’s overwhelming.

Please know that a warm smile, a simple hello, or a strong hug can go a long way.

A small gesture could be “everything” to someone who is just looking for a reason to hold on.

If you or anyone you know is considering suicide, please contact a friend or a hotline before giving in. SuicideStop.com contains a comprehensive list of suicide hotlines across the globe with folks who are ready to help. HelpGuide.org is a resource site containing a directory of International Mental Health resources.